UPDATE system_options SET multi_acquisition_ind = ‘Y’; (Sorry, old inside joke.)

All of this morning’s big news seems to involve big business deals between big companies.

All-stars and Blazers and Wolves, oh phooey.

Both of my teams are stuck in mediocrity, and I’ve been reduced to the most abject, pathetic state a basketball fan can find himself in.

Trades and Fisticuffs: it must be the NBA season.

Apparently, the best way to shed the JailBlazer image is to find someone even crazier than you.

Storm 74, Sun 60: I’m trying very hard to avoid the obvious puns.

For the first time since I’ve started following the WNBA, I didn’t really have an emotional investment in either of the teams playing in the Finals. That didn’t stop me from enjoying them, though.

Twins def. Yankees 2-0; Storm def. Monarchs 82-62; Democrats tie Republicans 0-0.

It was a busy night in sporting, as baseball and women’s basketball both had important playoff games played. The future of our political landscape also hung in the balance, but that’s nothing compared to five double plays.

Lynx 54, Storm 64: Time to look ahead.

The Lynx were knocked out of the playoffs by Seattle, doomed by their propensity towards turnovers. Now there’s nothing left but to look ahead to another offseason of rebuilding.

Argentina 89, USA 81: I come here not to bury hoops, but to praise it.

The USA didn’t lose this game; Argentina won it. That’s not what you’ll hear from all the fans and pundits, though.

Lithuania 94, USA 90: Upsetting, but not an upset.

As strange as it sounds, the U.S. almost upset an undefeated Lithuanian team today, but melted down in the last few minutes to give up another Olympic game.

Puerto Rico 92, USA 73: C’mon, you gotta be kiddin’ me.

The U.S. Olympic men’s basketball team is not playing in an exhibition tournament. Someone forgot to tell them this, and they lost in a big way to an overachieving Puerto Rican team.

Van Gorp comes out.

Michelle Van Gorp talks about being a lesbian in the WNBA, same-sex marriage, and various other issues.